I've claimed this status before and it didn't work out.
Well I'm through with a certain "human bean" after three years--I'm forcing myself this time. He made me mad. If my heart goes "on lockdown," so to speak, then he's the straw that broke the camel's back.
Mr. Blue Eyes is 30 going on 21--and he likes to give cold shoulders and silent treatments. Then when you ask him about it, he likes to pretend he doesn't know what you talking about. He's as manipulative as a woman. He makes me sick.
I'd be lying if I didn't feel terrible about this--if I wasn't still in love with the guy in some vague shape or form (who can resist those eyes?), but because I don't want to end up with a soft skull from beating it against the wall (and because my family might plan an intervention if it gets worse, LOL), I'm going to force myself to keep from talking to this jerk.
May God bless him, and may he find what he's looking for (although I don't give a shit since it ain't me), but keep in mind that karma goes six billion ways, and it shall come his way as well as mine, and he shall experience unrequited love like mine, and while he won't remember the so-called "crazy fat black bitch in my video class" (which I'm sure is what he meant when he told me I was "awesome"), he shall, like her, feel the full force of the sadness that comes with being tortured with deafening silence. I won't witness it, but I know the day will come. I was wrong, yes. But so was he, and we all know it, people.
Am I shutting out all others on his behalf? Well that depends--on both of us. I know I'll keep my mouth shut (or else I'll smack it!). But could he still be so cruel as parade a mock girlfriend around me--or worse, walk around with a pregnant female friend and pretend the baby's his? I don't completely put anything past him. If he hates me enough he'll do anything, I'm certain. At this point I honestly think he'd do something like sic a girlfriend on me or try to provoke me into saying something inappropriate. I think he would.
Perhaps that last line was a tad extreme. But like I said, if you dislike someone strongly enough...
