I lost my job this morning.

Okay--well, not completely. I'm waiting on a grievance hearing to get it back.

I was fired because I blew up at someone after they ridiculed me. I regressed back to my high-school years, and I lost my composure. Now, because of this, I might lose everything I have.

My family is supportive of me, as always, and they assure me that everything will be alright. It doesn't feel that way, though. I know everyone's been trying to get me to be happy and stay positive, but how can I? Things have gone so well for me in the past year, and now that's all been shot to pieces, it seems.

I've been crying off and on all day. In fact, my face is sore from my crying so much. I don't care; I still cry. I just lost a job I worked for seven years to keep. This job was all I knew, and now I don't know what to do. I don't think I'll ever find another job where I'll be paid $15 an hour, and I don't have enough education to take on an internship in my field of study. I shudder to think that I might have to flip burgers to get by. For me, that's the pits.

Despite what I feel, I know that God is testing me right now. He's testing me on my faith. I don't doubt that all this is happening for a reason. All I can do is keep praying that everything works out and keep living my life.

New Year, new emotions?...

So, it's 2008--a new year with new possibilites. A clean slate.

I'm kind of excited and scared all at the same time. I'm anticipating what new opportunities might come my way this year. 2007 was a great year for me, so I'm a bit more hopeful this year. However, I know that with the new year comes change, which scares me, because that change could be good or bad. But either way, I know that whatever happens this year will happen for a reason and that it will be a learning experience for me, an opportunity for personal growth, and that it can help shape me into the person I'm meant to be.

Hopefully, this year will be even better than the last, and hopefully I'll be able to open up more this year.